In the beginning there was Eva!

Ladies and Gentlemen! Step right up and observe for your entertainment, ME! This is a brief history of my first few moments and the days that follow, including some people that have made this show a hit so far. The critics are going wild!

Oh CRAP!!! It's a BABY!!!!

Here are my Grandma and Grandpa Stimac. Grandpa Stimac likes funny faces, I'm humoring him.

This is Uncle Nate wearing a normal shirt. They usually have something written on them that no one understands.

This is the first time Uncle Jerry held me. If you look carefully, you might notice me wrapping him around my little finger.

Uncle Lee and Aunt Josie.

This is my gay great-aunt Lynny-Pinny. She's not really gay, just very, very happy.

This is Aunty Al and my brother McDoo. Can you tell which is which?

This is my brother Bob. He thinks babies taste good. He eats cat turds. I hope I don't taste like cat turds. That would be bad.

This is my Aunty Julia. She is Daddy's sister. She lives far away from me. She's not too bright is she? Actually she's very smart. And she likes to shop! See my closet?

Zonked.

This is Aunty Amy. We call her Ace.

It's what her dad called her as a little girl and I guess it stuck. My dad calls me Monkey. Oh no...

I was only about a month old when this picture was taken, but the gorgeousness had already set in.

Dad thought it would be cute to stick these bows on my head. They stuck to my head like paparazzi to Britney Spears.